


Birthdays are complicated when you have no idea how they're supposed to be like

by lune_mar



Series: we will watch the sun rise together [4]
Category: Splatoon
Genre: Bad cake baking, Birthdays, Four is coming later, Gen, I love my girls but they are so bad, This is a bit random, Three's POV for once, female agents, they try their best
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-26
Updated: 2019-08-19
Packaged: 2020-05-20 09:35:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19374034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lune_mar/pseuds/lune_mar
Summary: Three and Eight have to organize Four's birthday, but, as always, they're bad at it.





	1. Shopping is complicated

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone! My final exam is tomorrow (wish me luck), so I wrote this to celebrate! I decided to separate it into chapters because writing big chunks of writing was getting a bit tiring. It should last 2 or 3 chapters, I'll try to get them out as soon as I can! Anyway, hope you'll enjoy!

Three thought she could handle most situations. She didn't do much, but it was always done well. Learning how to fight in record time? Done. Returning the Great Zapfish? Easy— well, it wasn't, but you get it. Breaking a gigantic blender and saving her mentor and Eight? Nailed it, even if she fell unconscious and only woke up a while later after everyone apparently saved the world, with half of her face burning and a massive headache. Avoiding all social interaction with people other than the other agents, Cap'n Cuttlefish and Off the Hook? She mastered it.

 

However, as she was standing at the entrance of Mako Mart, with an enthusiastic but confused Eight sitting in the cart she was holding, she felt absolutely, completely  _ lost _ .

 

They had to organize a secret birthday party. For Four, nonetheless. Which meant extra pressure, because it literally was today. This might have been easier if her and Eight hadn't been the only ones who could do it. Because, obviously, Callie and Marie were on tour in Calamari County, because they always were conveniently away whenever they needed them, and Pearl and Marina were as busy as always.

 

Of course, for normal people, organizing one single birthday party wouldn't be that hard.

However, Three and Eight weren't normal people.

Social interactions were the  _ bane  _ of Three. She could count the number of friends she had ever had on her hands, and did her best to avoid every single other beings. She had never organized (or attended) a party in her life, let alone a  _ birthday, _ and she felt kinda awkward because she knew absolutely nothing about it.

And then there was Eight, who literally learned what a birthday was  _ months ago _ . She didn't even remember her own (they should try to do something about it one day, Three noted) and the only thing she knew about birthdays were the things she vaguely saw and remembered seeing in movies.

 

Surely, they were the two most qualified people ever.

 

Three took a big breath, and tried to hide the continuous internal screaming she heard buzzing in her own ears. "Time?" she said in a low voice. She was oh so grateful she could keep such a blank face even though she was absolutely lost about everything.

 

Eight, who had been watching her in anticipation, nodded and looked at her phone. "It's, um… 11 am, I think."

 

_ 'Okay, 11 am. Four's shift ends at 7:30 pm, so she should come back at 8. That gives us 9 hours. Good. It means that if we burn her apartment down, we still have time to extinguish the fire. _

 

_ Great. Good. Everything's fine. Fine.  _ **Fine** _.' _

 

"Are you feeling okay?" she heard Eight ask, her pale gray eyes clouded with light concern. She probably noticed that she was taking even longer to think and do something than usual. She was tempted to curse her ability to read her well.

 

_ No _ . "Yes." That was probably a terrible answer to give her, but she could barely register any word she was saying. Actually, she longed to find some kind of water so she could jump into it as soon as she could. But then Eight would be completely alone, and even if Three didn't know what to do and it was making her tense, there was no way she was going to leave her on her own in a shopping cart. Especially at Mako Mart, actually.

 

Eight frowned slightly at her answer. "Okay," she simply said, and Three was relieved she didn't press further. If she discovered that the inkling felt as lost as she probably was, they probably would both start growing more and more nervous. "So… what do we need?"

 

_ Some help _ , she was tempted to say. Instead, she searched the pocket of the old hoodie she was wearing and retrieved a single paper. She had quickly noted what they needed to buy before going to the mart, so they wouldn't miss anything, and quickly gave Eight the paper.

 

The list… was still vague, though. She had simply written with her terrible handwriting to get some party decorations (which… wasn't helping that much), some wrapping to wrap the gift up, and cake ingredients.

 

Because, yeah. They were also baking their own cake.

Yeah, it sounded terrible, because it  _ was _ .

 

Eight had insisted that they needed to make their own cake, or otherwise, 'it wouldn't be the  _ same _ ! It's not authentic!' which… Three could agree with. She would feel bad to simply give Four some random garbage cake they had bought at the mart— because she definitely deserved more than that.

 

However, there was one little catch… They both barely knew how to bake.

 

Okay, Three wasn't  _ terrible _ at it, but she hadn't done it in so long she could barely remember anything. Heck, the last time she had done that, she had been helping her dad, who was  _ way _ better than her at baking, back when she still lived in the countryside, several years ago. And well… Eight was Eight. She loved food, but she never, ever cooked or baked anything.  _ 'And I'm pretty damn sure baking is not something you do often in the Octarian army. Or, at all, really.' _

 

So, there was a high percentage of chance that they were probably going to mess up the cake, probably catch something on fire, and end up giving Four something that looked more like a pile of burnt flour than a cake.

 

Add that to the fact that they had never planned a birthday before, and the afternoon sounded like it was going to go absolutely great.

 

Eight quickly read (well, more like deciphered) what was scrambled on the list, before nodding to herself, looking a bit nervous. However, when she looked up, her eyes definitely looked determined.

 

"We can do this!" she said with a serious tone, and even if Three had already prepared for the worst, she still quickly nodded back to her.

 

After all… she still hoped it wouldn't go too bad.  _ 'Four deserves a nice birthday.' _

 

\----------

 

Eight was still sitting in the cart, holding two different bottles in her hands, and looked at them with mixed curiosity and confusion. "Why are there so many types of milk?" she wondered with a low voice, frowning.

 

Three simply shrugged. She never asked herself that question, so she didn't really know what to answer. "....taste?" she supposed "Or… allergies, I guess…"

 

"Is Four allergic to something?"

 

"No. Marie said she wasn’t."

 

Eight's eyes couldn't help but shine. "Marie is so cautious!" she gushed. Of course, she was still very much baffled by everything the Squid Sisters were doing.

 

_ 'The logical question would be how she learned that, but we gotta keep the myth going…'  _

 

Humming slightly, Eight took one bottle she was holding— soy milk, Three noticed, and put it next to her and the various other ingredients in the cart. Soy milk should be fine… well, she hoped it wouldn't matter much anyway.

 

"We only need some chocolate and some…flour, I think!" Eight told her after she checked the list. "I still think that making her a chocolate cake is bland, though."

 

Three lifted an eyebrow, and Eight looked at her with deep seriousness.

 

"Chocolate is great, but it will look  _ boring _ ," she insisted. "It's not colorful enough!"

 

She should have guessed Eight would think that. Three took a while to think. "Four loves chocolate... And it's… um... easy to make." She almost forgot the word 'easy'. Speaking was difficult. It'd be better if they could all read minds.  _ 'Wait, no. That's a terrible idea. I don't want anyone to read my mind. I still want them to believe I'm calm and collected and that I'm cool, not panicking inside almost all the time.' _ "We can still decorate the cake when we finish it."

 

Eight's eyes suddenly got wide. "We can do that?" she gasped loudly.

 

"Oh, um... yeah. I'll show you later." Suddenly, Three felt like she perhaps shouldn't have brought that up.

 

As they continued to walk through the differents aisles, Three kept a close eye on Eight, in the cart. She always insisted to sit in it. It… looked a bit tiny for someone her size, but she always said she felt great. Apparently, getting pushed and rolling around was fun. Three didn't really mind, anyway. Had it been anyone else, they wouldn't even have been able to set one foot into the cart, but Eight simply had that power to melt her and let her do anything she wanted (except when it was something Pearl and Marina could potentially get angry about, because Three didn't want to see them angry  _ ever again _ )'

 

Shopping with Eight was kinda fun. She was baffled by a lot of things, especially ones you wouldn't think about, so it was entertaining. Three was never bored when she was around her. Well, she did take it upon her to answer her as best as she could about any question she had, and she had  _ a lot, _ so she never really had the occasion to. Still, seeing the octoling always so enthusiastic about everything made her feel great. Eight's presence was comforting, so that was maybe why she didn't feel as pressured by the whole organize-a-birthday-party thing as she thought she would be.

 

"I see flour!" Eight's voice took her out of her thoughts. "Why are there so many types again? Isn't it just… flour?"

 

Three looked at all the shelves, packed with many different brands and many different labels. There… probably was a reason to that, but like many things, she had absolutely no idea what it was. Everything was always complicated, anyway… Cod, why were they alone to do this? They clearly were both not prepared to any of this.

 

"I… don't know either." She picked out a random pack of flour, prayed it'd work, and dropped it gently into the cart. "Be careful not to drop it."

 

Eight winced. "Yeah, it happened once with Marina... It flew everywhere. It was a disaster to clean up…"

 

Cleaning up flour was the absolute worst, so that's probably why she didn't have any at her own home. You know, preventing the risk. And because she never cooked anything with it. She wasn't an expert at cooking anyway (well, she wasn't bad at it either, she just was… fine) and usually made the same food over and over, and she knew she didn't need it much.

 

They took chocolate on their way out, once again just taking a random brand, because it was chocolate. There was no way it'd taste different anyway. However, they couldn't really find any party decorations anywhere. She guessed they'd have to find that in another shop. Three hoped it wouldn't take too long, because seeing so many people around was starting to make her nervous. She didn't deal with people well, especially not when there were a lot of strangers, and she couldn't wait to be somewhere calmer, because then she'd get to appreciate the calm, even if she was pretty sure it was going to be everything  _ but  _ calm once they'd get to the apartment.

 

They still had one thing to buy, though, and Three was obligated to go, but she still felt like it was going to be a bad idea somehow. She quickly found the aisle, and took a long breath. "Here are the cake decorations…" Before she could think of what she said though, she slipped : "You can take what you want."

 

Her mind instantly screamed.  _ 'Oh cod. I shouldn't have said that, should I?' _

 

Eight's eyes lit up and she looked at what was on the aisle with curious and enthusiastic eyes. "There's a lot," she commented, before she led out an audible gasp. "Oh, there's the little colors thingies!"

 

_ 'Little colors thingies?' _ Three got closer, and looked at what the octoling was holding. "That's sprinkles," she told her, and Eight smiled brightly.

 

"I didn't know you could buy those! I always see them everywhere! Can we take some?" Before Three could even answer however, she had already dropped two cans of it into the cart.

 

Three couldn't do anything besides watch Eight take a lot of different types of sprinkles- the usual small ones, some pink ones that looked like little hearts, little stars, and many many others… because apparently, while it didn't matter for milk or flour, types of sprinkles were  _ incredibly _ important. She also took colors (and a scary amount) of candles, because 'it'd look super great with all the sprinkles', and she started to wonder what kind of look the cake would end up having. She couldn't refuse any of this, of course. Because she had been a  _ fool, _ and for once didn't think before she talked. And stopping Eight would make her sad, and she would  _ never do that _ . Now, as a punishment, she just had to watch the many, many decorations drop into the cart.

When Three thought the pile of decorations was already big enough however, Eight took out a can of something on the shelf. She frowned slightly. "What is this?"

 

Three quickly looked over and read the package. Her ink turned cold instantly.  _ '...Four. I am sorry for this.' _

"It's… um… edible glitter…"

 

Eight turned her head to stare at her.

 

Her eyes didn't even let go of Three as, with a swift movement of the arm, she dropped every single can of the edible glitter into the cart.

 

_ '...I'm so, so sorry.' _

 

Three was beginning to really,  _ really  _ fear for that cake.

 

The afternoon looked great already.


	2. Cake are complicated

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> .........so uh two months  
> I'M REALLY SORRY FOR THE TIME IT TOOK this chapter took me a while to finish and I had to redo it a few times, so it was pretty complicated to write! I hope it will be enjoyable anyway, even if its not the longest chapter ever! I don't really have much to say, but I hope you'll enjoy it anyway!

Shopping at MakoMart was apparently the easiest thing to do that day, as even trying to find a shop selling party decorations in the big mall had taken a long, long while. Three knew that she didn't have the greatest sense of direction, but it was almost comical at this point. The two agents got lost one or two or ten times, discovered they both couldn't read simple maps, walked all across the entire mall only to learn that the shop they had been looking for was super close to the mart. Three wasn't even surprised at that point, she simply wondered if their whole afternoon was going to feel just like utter disappointment.

As expected, Eight chose most of what they bought, because, again, trying to stop Eight from doing anything she set her mind to was impossible. Yeah, they probably had a bit too much party hats for what was going to be a party of three people. Yeah, the amount of rainbow-themed items they had bought (Eight _insisted_ ) was concerning. Yeah, they didn't need that much balloons. But you know what? It was fine.

Everything was _fine_.

 

At least, the two agents had finished their shopping now — well, they hoped anyway, because Three sincerely didn't want to run back to the mall because they forgot to buy something. Not that the mall was far from Four's apartment, she was just too lazy to go search for it.

(That was a lie, if they missed something important she'd be the first one to run to go get it and she knew it, but she would never admit that. Curse Four and her ability to make her care about her birthday.)

 

She was glad that Four lived near the mall, holding heavy bags wasn't that hard to her thanks to physical training, but it sure was annoying. They now were in front of Four's apartment, and Three grumbled as she searched her pockets for the key, only to realize she had forgotten it at home. Great, the _one_ time she washed her hoodie in who-knows-how-long, she forgot to take what was in its pockets with her. Curse everything.

 

"Wait, I've got spare keys!" Eight called next to her. She was relieved but she had a puzzled look when she saw the octoling holding _fifteen_ differents keys in her hand.  _'...Wait, why does she have so many keys?'_

The other agent seemingly read her silent question since she continued : "I always sleep somewhere different every night, so I need the keys! Look, here's yours." She tapped with one of her finger a tiny one with a green plastic tag on it. (Three didn't even remember giving her a key.) "I even have the keys to Marie and Callie's studio!" The octoling gushed.

As Eight told her about every single key she owned, Three was simply staring. _'...How many fans would kill to get_ one _key from this?'_ That… was a concerning question to have. The octoling had an unknown power and threat in her hands, right now.

 

They entered Four's apartment when Eight finally opened the door. Three wasn't surprised to see it as clean as ever. Not a trace of dust, or anything on the ground… How much time did she spend cleaning, anyway? _'Well, apparently enough to keep her up late at night.'_ ...Now wasn't the time to think about that. She'd have to talk to Eight about it.

 

Three put the bags to the floor as she looked at her phone. 2pm already?! Did they really spend 3 hours at the mall? Cod. They still had 6 hours left… it should be enough, hopefully.

 

"What should we start with?" Eight asked, quickly looking at everything that was in the bags. 

Three crossed her arms in thoughts. "...The cake, probably." She had no idea how much time it was going to take. While baking a cake was usually not hard, she preferred to have extra time. Just in case they, you know, burnt the first one or something. The decorations could wait for a bit.

 

"Cake!" Eight cheered with enthusiasm. "It's my first time making one!" The octoling started humming happily before taking the bag with the cooking ingredients to the kitchen.

Three was not sure how it was going to go, but at least Eight looked excited.

_'Let's pray we don't burn down the house. That'd be nice.'_

 

\-----------

 

Turns out, Eight was indeed very enthusiast about the whole cake baking thing. Actually, maybe a little too much.

 

She was looking at Three with a sheepish stare, holding the mixing bowl and the whisk in her arms. "I'm really sorry," she apologized again. "I didn't know you shouldn't stir too hard…"

 

Three was holding a broom, trying to swipe an exploded bag of flour and a broken bowl on the ground. She wasn't even sure it was working that well. Heck, the broom was quickly becoming whiter than the kitchen floor itself. "It's okay," Three repeated again. "I should have warned you."

 

She wasn't even annoyed, just tired. She had expected them to mess up at some point. She simply was surprised it was because Eight went absolutely wild on the stirring process. So hard she had knocked most of what was on the counter on the ground, somehow…

 

Cooking with Eight was nice, when they weren't messing up. She learned quickly (well, more like she was great at mimicking. Octoling thing, she supposed), even if she had to stop her from eating everything she was seeing. Maybe they wouldn't mess up the cake in the end.

 _'Don't be hopeful. Dread everything, so you won't be disappointed.'_  

 

The ground was still very much white, but Three was getting tired of swiping that flour around. She threw the broom in a side of the kitchen. She'd finish it later.

 

She heard a snicker, and found Eight looking at her with amused eyes. "You have flour on your mantle," she told her. Three looked at it, only to find it entirely covered in white. _'That's going to be a pain to clean… Awesome.'_ "Between that and the pink, you're not even green anymore!"

Three frowned. "Pink?" she repeated, looking at her mantle again. She was concerned when she saw that, indeed, most of it had turned pink. _'Wait, where does it come from?'_

 

Eight looked at her with surprise. "Wait, you didn't know?" She pointed, while still holding the whisk, at her own tentacles. "I thought you were just mimicking my color."

It… was indeed the exact same color as Eight's hue. _'What. I... never meant that?'_ Since when was she doing that?! She looked dumbfounded at her mantle. She thought she was _green_ the whole time! She never changed her colors.

 

Three's confused look was Eight's answer. "You really don't know then?" The octoling looked as surprised as her. "You do it all the time when we hang out, you wear everyone's ink colors. You have a lot of differents colors on, it's really fun! You even turned pink and teal when we ate with Pearl and Marina once!" She scratched her cheek, pensive. "I thought it was just something you liked doing."

 _'What the hell.'_ Why had no one told her that? For some reason, it was making her more flustered than what she expected. She quickly turned back to a full green, but saw some hints of pink still littering her mantle. _'Great. Didn't know I turned into a abstract painting when I'm with other people.'_ Once this day was over, she was not leaving her apartment ever again.

 

"Is it bothering you?" Eight almost looked disappointed when she saw Three turn green again. "Wait, I'll do it too if you want!" With a happy hum, she lightly touched her tentacles, and the tips and small circles covering them took her green shade with ease. "We can match now!"

 

Three felt her face growing hotter by the second now. "Let's… let's go back to the cake," she decided, mumbling under her breath. She heard Eight laugh, and she cursed this day again.

 

\-----------

 

"Eight. Stop that. I can see you."

 

Eight stuck her finger out of the bowl, bringing some melted chocolate to her mouth as quickly as she could. "I don't see what you mean," she answered innocently, her voice coming out slightly muffled as she ate whatever chocolate that was left on her hand.

 

They were almost finished now, except that the baking was becoming more like 'preventing Eight from eating absolutely everything on the counter'. Apparently, the batter was good enough for her to try and eat small pieces of it every 10 seconds, and if it wasn't for Three stopping her she probably would have drunk the whole melted chocolate herself. Seeing how she had once seen her finish an entire cup of noodles in less than thirty seconds, she knew Eight could (and would) do it. Three just wanted to finish the cake as quickly as they could.

 

"Alright," Three said as she took the bowl of chocolate in her hands. Eight frowned, putting her concentration back to the baking instantly. She was still very serious about the whole process, when she wasn't eating from it. "Keep stirring while I put it in."

Thankfully this time, Eight didn't cause a stirring disaster, and Three was more than relieved to see the finally finished batter, even if she almost spilled the chocolate bowl. Done. Finished. They only needed to put it in the oven now. Thank whatever gods existed for not messing up the entire batter.

 

"Wait!" suddenly said Eight. When she turned her head towards her, the shine in her eyes somehow made her afraid. "Can I put in the glitter now?"

Three would be lying if she said she hadn't hoped that Eight would forget about it. "...You can."

"Great!" she answered excitedly, and smashed full cans of edible glitter on the counter within the second. Three could only dreadfully watch Eight as, with a focused expression, she poured all of them into the batter, which quickly turned shinier than the sun itself. ' _Maybe I should have looked up if you can get food poisoning from this.'_ The batter probably had more glitter in it that actual food now, but Three just gave it up.

 

Eight only stopped when she judged that it was shiny enough, which probably meant 'way too much' by everyone's else standard. She hummed happily as she put down in the bag whatever small glitter remained. "What do we do now?" 

"Well….We need to put it in a, uh… baking pan. Then we put it in the oven, and we're done."

 

Eight nodded, but quickly turned around towards the door. "I'm just going to the bathroom really quick. I have chocolate all over my face!" 

As she left the kitchen, Three started mindlessly opening the drawers and cupboards. _'Might as well look for the baking pan…'_ While Four's kitchen was probably the cleanest she knew (when they weren't baking in it, that is), she had no idea how the hell it was organized. It probably made sense to the other agent but Three had no idea where to look for a baking pan, no matter how many times she stayed in her apartment. She opened other cupboards, getting more and more lost. Why wasn't she putting her silverware in a drawer? That made no sen—

_'IS THAT A FUCKING BLENDER.'_

It was sitting alone in a pile of dust in a corner, looking like it hadn't been used in months.The hell machine almost looked _smug,_ as if it knew exactly what its sight meant to the staring Inkling.

 

Of course, Three absolutely hated it the instant she saw it.

 _'Eight CANNOT see it,'_ she thought quickly. _'I need to hide it NOW.'_

 

' _Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you fuck you_ **_fuck you_ ** _—'_

 

In a swift, calculated motion of the arm, Three caught the devilish object with her hands and gracefully threw it out of the open window.

 

"I'm back!" She heard the door open, and Eight appeared at the same time as the loud crashing sound of the blender echoed outside.

The two stared at each other. The octoling narrowed her eyes, suspicious. "What—"

"You heard nothing." Three quickly whispered. Eight could only watch with confusion as Three flipped off something on the ground before slowly closing the window.

 

Eight did try to look at what made the sound outside but Three protectively guarding the window prevented her from it. They managed to find the baking pan in a drawer in the end, and finally put the batter in the oven. Finished. It could burn down for all she cared. Well, it'd be better if it didn't— but she had something else on her mind right now.

Three let her body drop on the couch, before pulling up her phone.

 

[2:47] Three : FOUR

[2:47] Four : oh shit caps im dead

[2:48] Three : WHY DO YOU HAVE A BLENDER IN YOUR KITCHEN

[2:48] Four : a blender??

[2:48] Four : OH YEAH I HAVE ONE

[2:48] Three : why.

[2:49] Four : i didn't even remember i had it

[2:49] Four : it was the one from my old house, my mom gave it to me when i came here

[2:50] Four : wait what are you doing in my house

[2:51] Three : ok bye

[2:51] Four : THREE

 

Three almost wanted to throw her phone out of the window too, but opted for throwing it on the couch instead. She let out a low sigh as she buried her face into a pillow. She'd give anything for a nap right now. Actually, maybe she could—

 

She felt sharp fingers tug gently at her mantle. "No napping!" Eight scowled her. "We still have everything else to do!"

 

Three let out an even deeper sigh as she reluctantly sat up. _'Way to ruin a squid's dreams of tranquility…'_ She took a glance on the cushion, only to find that she had left some more leftover flour on it. That was one more thing to clean again.

 

"Come on, the quicker we do it, the sooner you can nap!" Eight was already going through the two other bags they had brought. She started to take out various items, all getting more and more colorful by the second. She looked at Three and gave her a motivated smile. "We're going to make this really awesome, you'll see!"

 

Deep down, she didn't really know if it was going to be _this_ awesome, but seeing Eight so motivated did grow a bit on her. Four may keep secret blenders in her kitchen, but at least she _did_ deserve that they try to make her birthday really great.

 

She got up and walked closer to Eight, still talking about where they could hang all of the decorations they bought, and set aside the napping for a while.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading! I hope you're all having a good day or night!!

**Author's Note:**

> I learned that edible glitter existed a few weeks ago and it's been my biggest discovery ever since
> 
> Anyway, hope you liked it! First time writing Three's pov, hope it felt fine! I love my girl but I have a hard time writing her ouch
> 
> Have a good day/night everyone!


End file.
